I was recently immersed in a conversation with a fellow momma who was talking about finding out who ‘she’ was, and not just as ‘mom’. Let’s face it, we absolutely love being momma’s and being depended on. BUT before babies came along we were different. We had hobbies and a life outside the home. Now we have little ones that take over… and this is not about not appreciating them. BECAUSE WE DO! WE ABSOLUTELY LOVE OUR KIDDOS! However, it is a struggle to find that great balance in life. Of having time for just you when you’re surrounded by lego pieces, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, and constant little hands reaching for you at all times of the day (and night!).
Trying to keep the house clean, the kids fed, the kids entertained throughout the day … then dinner for the family made, baths and bedtime routine done … and then they go to bed and you try and spend time with your spouse because it’s the only one on one time you get before falling into bed at 9 pm and starting all over again. It’s hard to find that time for just you when you have a million and one things to take care of or do.
I often feel pressure to keep things clean, but then the pressure gets to me in a bad way and nothing gets done. However, if I get a little time to myself I feel like I can tackle my to do list. The days that I get time to myself, the house is actually picked up and do lots of activities with the kiddos. .. The days I feel depleted, that’s a whole other story. Dishes sit in the sink, laundry sits in the dryer still needing to be folded, there’s toys scattered all over the house … it’s like a tornado ran through our small house.
Although in our house our tornado’s name is Collins … the second child I tell you. My house was always picked up with just our oldest. I got to take naps when she napped .. I had lots more time on my hands because she took not just one nap, but two. I could rest during one (or choose to do something I enjoyed), and the other nap I got to clean the house. With our second child…. this doesn’t happen!
Please don’t feel overwhelmed with motherhood. You do not have to be perfect and all put together. Trust me hardly (if anyone) is. Take the afternoon nap time to do something for you instead of cleaning one day. I’m not saying do this every day .. but once in awhile you need it. How can you take care of others in your household if you are on empty? I know I’m a much better mother and wife when I feel replenished. Sometimes it just takes a trip to the grocery store by myself with a Starbucks coffee and headphones in my ears. I’m more focused on the kiddos, my patience is high, and I have more energy to tackle the every day craziness!
I was lucky enough in the beginning of May to spend a morning to myself when my husband and I took an overnight trip to St. Louis for his work. I got to enjoy a walk around a beautiful park, grab a snack that I could eat all to myself, and read a book without pictures in it! It was a perfect sunny, breezy morning to just be me, a person who loves reading books outside while enjoying Starbucks! I was also going to enjoy a lunch by myself (something I’ve never done, but now really want to!) However, due to my poor hubby getting sick on our trip we went home earlier than expected. One day I’ll go do lunch by myself! ANNNNNND I will be writing a post about the AHHHMAZING book I read while we were there at a later date!
Do you take some time for yourself? If so how? If not, how could you or what would you like to do?!